i realized that when i xanga or blog or whatever...it's for other people to read...to update people on what's going on. So what about me? i remember getting blog or xanga at first so that when there's something on my mind...i can just say it u know...so from now on that's what it's going to be...me..inside and out. if you want to know what's going on...you can ask me.
lately i've been feeling empty...not like the lonely empty...more like the...unsatisified...then unfilling hunger of something more. it's like...no matter what good marks i get, or how many people i hang out with, or how many times i call people on the phone, or how many emails i get...they're just...temporal satisifaction. at the end of the day...there's a hole in my heart and soul that none can fill cept for God. I've been drifting a lot...acknowledging it...yet not doing anything about it. it sucks...really really sucks. and im not sure why. perhaps it's because i just don't want to fix it enough...or maybe im too lazy...or maybe i'm too busy...k that last one was a horrible excuse. God always gives us enough time. i believe that. I'm not really going anywhere spiritually. when people say im "hardcore christian" i hate it...because i can't live up to that. I read my devo..this morning...haven't done devos in a while....read the book freddy gave me...My Utmost for His Highest. and today's devo was about solitude with God. wow...it's been a while...since i let go of all my ideas, questions...and just sat in front of God...at His feet and listened. it said that God cannot possibly teach us until we let go of our questions...ideas...anything...and just sit there...in awe...in silence. When there's nothing left...when there's nothing that can satisfy us...when we are in the state of total depravity...He teaches. ha. no wonder i haven't been growing. i've been doing everything for myself...never felt like there was meaning to it...i study cuz I want to get a good mark...i make decisions without the concent of God. I've currently been reading the book Facing Your Giants by Max Lucado (good book)...basically talking about the story of David...and there was a point in time where none of his decisions had God in it...like apparently for chapters, God's name wasn't even mentioned. and in the end...his whole family suffered from it.
There's a sense of nothingness when nothing goes to God...sense of emptiness when none of your decisions are brought up to God. it's time to change that...in everything i do, bring it up into prayer...whether it be choosing university, doing things for retreat, even when going out or doing my work. and may i expect something...not just empty words...but may i expect an answer...because God ALWAYS gives one.
Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours.
-Mark 11:24
Saturday, January 13, 2007
Monday, January 01, 2007
hoi sum new year =)
Happy new years everyone!
this year has had it's ups and downs
those tough, crying days
those crazy unforgetable moments with the coolest kids around
those bittersweet moments
those moments that make you go aww
those awesome late night phone calls or long phone calls that make your arm hurt from holding the phone too long
the cards, the gifts, the letters
the endless emails
those amazing moments where I could jus sit in the presence of God
hehe so highlights of this week, cuz it was honestly amazing! haha and i havent updated in a while.
Jam Day
-lotz of creativity, random playing, and just pure fun =) spontaneous man. TOTALLY spontaneous. good times with you guys : )
- haha going to M&Ms and taking FOREVER to figure out what to eat
- me & mel talkin =) love u girlll
-playing gamecube =) hehe screamin is fun....but my awful lost wasn't. sooo humiliating.darn you darren.
- yummy foood and desert : ) hehe very very yummy
Downhere Concert
- left house at 4:30 and went downtown with dt, mel & kitty
- mel was dying..her head was falling off haha and me & dt being mean about it (volunteer?) haha we love u mel
- went to eaton center for a while
- went to little anthony's for dinner, spent so much =(
- not being able to pronounce any of the food names. HAHA failing when ordering (penne is pronounced pen-ae)
- me & ky talkin about our boys
-cheryl came to join us =)
- movie talk haha aww poor mel. that was day 1 of the 3 day strike movie talk haha
- went to cheryl's room and mel tried to feel better =)
- haha me & ky were flying and eating buildings HAHA (this is how bored we were)
- dt crushed advil and failed, leaving lil bits stuck in ody's mouth
- downhere concert was awesome! saw joses & rachel :) haha i loved the concert!!!! =) so many good times
- dt's "rock stars need money" t-shirt
- desert @ baton rouge =) it was yummy
- cheryl & my "agnes moments"
30th
- went to worship practice : ) got my scary present hehe
- went to eatons like all day =) bought boots & pjs
- got two CDs :)
New years eve
- going to national's and dt trying 2 wear my shoe =/ and i thot he broke it. haha
- wings with hsieh, eric, sharon, justin, & fok jr. haha thanks hsieh! so yummy! haha first time there haha i feel accomplished HAHA
- talkin about double datin' for the holiday =)
- watched pursuit of happYness : ) i love i love. hehe mel kept crying. i almost cried.
- me & ky's love for tarzan haha
- played jenga w/ my cousins and took weird pictures haha
- went to jfok's house after dinner where we watched me, you, and dupree, it was okay. haha
- playing mau. I KNOW HOW TO PLAY NOW haha it was fun, my rule rocks : )
- watching...some..movie that jason really liked HAHA on TV. what was it? something about...this guy who dressed up as a nanny or something? to fix his marriage?
- countdown =)
- he called =)
- we were soo tired, tickling dt is fun =)
-ahha ky screaming when she tried turnin on bathroom lights
- my interesting...chocolate experience
- chocolate mouse cake =)
hehe total joax.
still to come:
- trisia's party
- double date haha
- jammin with my cousins!
hehe =) and i still gotta finish
- chem exam
- bio isu
- study for algeo test
and throughout the break, i bought
- garage top
- guess bag
- feet first boots
- lasenza pjs
- mittens and tank top from urban planet
- and many dinners that left my poor.
this year has had it's ups and downs
those tough, crying days
those crazy unforgetable moments with the coolest kids around
those bittersweet moments
those moments that make you go aww
those awesome late night phone calls or long phone calls that make your arm hurt from holding the phone too long
the cards, the gifts, the letters
the endless emails
those amazing moments where I could jus sit in the presence of God
hehe so highlights of this week, cuz it was honestly amazing! haha and i havent updated in a while.
Jam Day
-lotz of creativity, random playing, and just pure fun =) spontaneous man. TOTALLY spontaneous. good times with you guys : )
- haha going to M&Ms and taking FOREVER to figure out what to eat
- me & mel talkin =) love u girlll
-playing gamecube =) hehe screamin is fun....but my awful lost wasn't. sooo humiliating.darn you darren.
- yummy foood and desert : ) hehe very very yummy
Downhere Concert
- left house at 4:30 and went downtown with dt, mel & kitty
- mel was dying..her head was falling off haha and me & dt being mean about it (volunteer?) haha we love u mel
- went to eaton center for a while
- went to little anthony's for dinner, spent so much =(
- not being able to pronounce any of the food names. HAHA failing when ordering (penne is pronounced pen-ae)
- me & ky talkin about our boys
-cheryl came to join us =)
- movie talk haha aww poor mel. that was day 1 of the 3 day strike movie talk haha
- went to cheryl's room and mel tried to feel better =)
- haha me & ky were flying and eating buildings HAHA (this is how bored we were)
- dt crushed advil and failed, leaving lil bits stuck in ody's mouth
- downhere concert was awesome! saw joses & rachel :) haha i loved the concert!!!! =) so many good times
- dt's "rock stars need money" t-shirt
- desert @ baton rouge =) it was yummy
- cheryl & my "agnes moments"
30th
- went to worship practice : ) got my scary present hehe
- went to eatons like all day =) bought boots & pjs
- got two CDs :)
New years eve
- going to national's and dt trying 2 wear my shoe =/ and i thot he broke it. haha
- wings with hsieh, eric, sharon, justin, & fok jr. haha thanks hsieh! so yummy! haha first time there haha i feel accomplished HAHA
- talkin about double datin' for the holiday =)
- watched pursuit of happYness : ) i love i love. hehe mel kept crying. i almost cried.
- me & ky's love for tarzan haha
- played jenga w/ my cousins and took weird pictures haha
- went to jfok's house after dinner where we watched me, you, and dupree, it was okay. haha
- playing mau. I KNOW HOW TO PLAY NOW haha it was fun, my rule rocks : )
- watching...some..movie that jason really liked HAHA on TV. what was it? something about...this guy who dressed up as a nanny or something? to fix his marriage?
- countdown =)
- he called =)
- we were soo tired, tickling dt is fun =)
-ahha ky screaming when she tried turnin on bathroom lights
- my interesting...chocolate experience
- chocolate mouse cake =)
hehe total joax.
still to come:
- trisia's party
- double date haha
- jammin with my cousins!
hehe =) and i still gotta finish
- chem exam
- bio isu
- study for algeo test
and throughout the break, i bought
- garage top
- guess bag
- feet first boots
- lasenza pjs
- mittens and tank top from urban planet
- and many dinners that left my poor.
Friday, December 29, 2006
HAHA
haha the wonders of a mac book HAHA
i love kcab hehe if i got a mac then this is wut i would do with my life. AHAH
i love kcab hehe if i got a mac then this is wut i would do with my life. AHAH
Sunday, December 24, 2006
k so christmas break started as of friday :) good stuff. man. good times w/ jane shopping haha having some girlie time. and getting chicken little from kenny & calvin :) thanks kiddies u're the best! haha i love their card =P anywhoosss then went to jc's house =) hehe had dinner with peeps. hehe u can ask me if you want to know more. ;)
saturday was...kcab party =) haha good times and what not haha total fun taking pictures HAHA i loveee kcab! and then sunday....was...baptism..that's today! yayy party with my cousinss :P haha i love my cousins. they're amazingg...kk so for the rest of the christmas...here's my schedule
25 - christmas! grandma coming home : )
26 - boxing day
27 - jam & dinner day
28 -
29 - downhere concert!
30 -
31 - new years chillage..dunno where yet. =P
1 -
2 - trisia's house party =)
3 -
4 - going into loo? we'll see =P
5 -
6 -
7 -
8 - school =(
and somewhere in january...some cell group partayy. haha and then...i also hafta do university stuff and projects. haha
so book me =P or you lose. HAHA and cy u still owe me hot chocolate and hsieh u owe me wings =) ahaha
that's all. : )
happy.
saturday was...kcab party =) haha good times and what not haha total fun taking pictures HAHA i loveee kcab! and then sunday....was...baptism..that's today! yayy party with my cousinss :P haha i love my cousins. they're amazingg...kk so for the rest of the christmas...here's my schedule
25 - christmas! grandma coming home : )
26 - boxing day
27 - jam & dinner day
28 -
29 - downhere concert!
30 -
31 - new years chillage..dunno where yet. =P
1 -
2 - trisia's house party =)
3 -
4 - going into loo? we'll see =P
5 -
6 -
7 -
8 - school =(
and somewhere in january...some cell group partayy. haha and then...i also hafta do university stuff and projects. haha
so book me =P or you lose. HAHA and cy u still owe me hot chocolate and hsieh u owe me wings =) ahaha
that's all. : )
happy.
Sunday, December 17, 2006
so this weekend has been quite..the awesomeness =) hehe my madly hectic week was FINALLY over on friday. got a test and a quiz this week and i'll be DONE =) CHRISTMASSSS hahaha soo exciting. and this weekend was just soo relaxing. aww man soo much chillage..
Friday
- got to church and stressed like mad on retreat forms. *sigh. it's okay they're done now...but...yea...we still got tonzz to do. madly stressing over retreat. ughhhh *pulls hair out* haha
- pretty christmas cookies =) that i thot tim & tiff made....i didnt see the package okayyyyy goshhhh
- relentless practice =) went okay. jw had to go though. well we did whatever we could =)
- i was amazed that darren could finally reach that note...pretty darn impressive. haha
Saturday (greatest day)
- woke up at 8:15 for 9 practice for relentless
- went to church and darren got me a mcmuffin!!!! =) excitinggg haha i was very happy. but the paper was see-through. ew. haha darren wasnt too happy. considering he had to go back to get the mcmuffin for mee..
- had practice =) it was awesomee. hahaha me & sharon playing with sounds HAHAHA *tweet tweet* *gunshot* *car screech**thump* HAHA we killed a bird on the piano. haha so joax. and aww man the solos and wut not SOO cool. props to darren & jc man =) u guys..figured it out..amazingly hahaha i heard it..i was like...this is TOTALLY the works of the boys. hahaha
- at night, we had christmas celebration AHAH SOOO JOAX
- relentless =) u guys did awesomeee. ahha awesome fun.
- i will follow you performance was hilarious. haha the adults are amazinggg
- tim's little....dancing on stage with freddy....with the chicken dance
- haha translating was quite interesting. freddy should've jus translated his whole sermon himself. haha
- the MCs. were so joax
- i was introduced to a guy name joses about 4 times. =) he's really nice. his name rhymes with moses. he's from waterloo. haha
- went to wendy's after..where they cracked open eric's phone
- i attempted to throw into darren's mouth..like...a crumb of mcnuggets
- me & cheryl's random fobby highness HAHA man i love u girl
- me getting high from the hot chocolate
Sunday
- went to sunday service
- darren's going to get me 5 sausage mcmuffins for christmas. ew
- little kids are SO cute =)
- went to jc's house to play wii
- boys were being gay when it comes to parking. dumbbutts
- haha michael was like wheezing while boxing HAHA making noises when he breathes
- me trying to see my present. booo i wanna see ittttt. haha jon and sharon said it was nice...so i trust them. hahah
- eric..scarring darren for LIFE with his....dancing?
haha that's all =) AND IM GOING TO SEE HAPPY FEET LATERRR =) EXCITING. hehehehe
ehehehhe soo cute
HAHAH i typed in happy feet...i also found this. HAHA
people are weird.
Friday
- got to church and stressed like mad on retreat forms. *sigh. it's okay they're done now...but...yea...we still got tonzz to do. madly stressing over retreat. ughhhh *pulls hair out* haha
- pretty christmas cookies =) that i thot tim & tiff made....i didnt see the package okayyyyy goshhhh
- relentless practice =) went okay. jw had to go though. well we did whatever we could =)
- i was amazed that darren could finally reach that note...pretty darn impressive. haha
Saturday (greatest day)
- woke up at 8:15 for 9 practice for relentless
- went to church and darren got me a mcmuffin!!!! =) excitinggg haha i was very happy. but the paper was see-through. ew. haha darren wasnt too happy. considering he had to go back to get the mcmuffin for mee..
- had practice =) it was awesomee. hahaha me & sharon playing with sounds HAHAHA *tweet tweet* *gunshot* *car screech**thump* HAHA we killed a bird on the piano. haha so joax. and aww man the solos and wut not SOO cool. props to darren & jc man =) u guys..figured it out..amazingly hahaha i heard it..i was like...this is TOTALLY the works of the boys. hahaha
- at night, we had christmas celebration AHAH SOOO JOAX
- relentless =) u guys did awesomeee. ahha awesome fun.
- i will follow you performance was hilarious. haha the adults are amazinggg
- tim's little....dancing on stage with freddy....with the chicken dance
- haha translating was quite interesting. freddy should've jus translated his whole sermon himself. haha
- the MCs. were so joax
- i was introduced to a guy name joses about 4 times. =) he's really nice. his name rhymes with moses. he's from waterloo. haha
- went to wendy's after..where they cracked open eric's phone
- i attempted to throw into darren's mouth..like...a crumb of mcnuggets
- me & cheryl's random fobby highness HAHA man i love u girl
- me getting high from the hot chocolate
Sunday
- went to sunday service
- darren's going to get me 5 sausage mcmuffins for christmas. ew
- little kids are SO cute =)
- went to jc's house to play wii
- boys were being gay when it comes to parking. dumbbutts
- haha michael was like wheezing while boxing HAHA making noises when he breathes
- me trying to see my present. booo i wanna see ittttt. haha jon and sharon said it was nice...so i trust them. hahah
- eric..scarring darren for LIFE with his....dancing?
haha that's all =) AND IM GOING TO SEE HAPPY FEET LATERRR =) EXCITING. hehehehe
HAHAH i typed in happy feet...i also found this. HAHA
Wednesday, December 13, 2006
update.
k soo havent updated in awhile...so since i dont have a test tomorrow (finally, a day off this week) i can update! haha soooo here's wut's happening
+ lovin all those talks me & nat have =) ehhe we're so alike. haha so joax
+ lovin those emails everyday
+ lovin those txt msgs everyday hehe 3 months of txting is amazing =P
+ friends constantly reminding me that it's ALMOST christmas
+ friends constantly encouraging me and tellin me to just...hang in there
+ excited for chillage during christmas
+ slowly letting stupid tests go. i'm done with them..moving on
+ im excited for downhere =D hehe
hehe so i really cant think of anything bad...either than i failed my physics test today. darn failing 3 tests in the past week is DEFINATELY not fun. but..not giving up. and not dwelling on it either cuz one of my friends reminded me that you just gotta move onn and learn to deal with it right? =)
awesome now time to do prep for my physics performance task...hoping i dont fail. ahaha
+ lovin all those talks me & nat have =) ehhe we're so alike. haha so joax
+ lovin those emails everyday
+ lovin those txt msgs everyday hehe 3 months of txting is amazing =P
+ friends constantly reminding me that it's ALMOST christmas
+ friends constantly encouraging me and tellin me to just...hang in there
+ excited for chillage during christmas
+ slowly letting stupid tests go. i'm done with them..moving on
+ im excited for downhere =D hehe
hehe so i really cant think of anything bad...either than i failed my physics test today. darn failing 3 tests in the past week is DEFINATELY not fun. but..not giving up. and not dwelling on it either cuz one of my friends reminded me that you just gotta move onn and learn to deal with it right? =)
awesome now time to do prep for my physics performance task...hoping i dont fail. ahaha
Tuesday, December 05, 2006
k so it sucks.
it sucks getting the physics test back that you thought you did well on and actually did pretty bad on. The teacher doesnt think it's bad. but you do. and on top of that, this test dropped you three percent. yes it sucks.
so i ended up getting it today after i got back to the science center and honestly when i found out it dropped me three percent. i was ready to cry. but u kno let's not cry in front of the teacher now. that's bad. i mean he knows im upset already. no need to make it worse. so on my way to my locker. i see gordon. and i showed it to him. i couldnt help it anymore. i started to cry. not like...wailing kinda cry. more like..silent tears kinda crying. and unlike everyone else, he seemed to be very understand. Gordon is always very understanding. I mean yea three percent..i kno im not allowed to complain cuz im still getting high 80s but at the same time...it's like..it's disappointing. and i just cant drop. i just..can't. and i tried to stop myself from crying..too bad the harder i tried..the more tears came out. so i said...
k agnes u gotta stop. it's not worth cryin over
then it hit me...
this crying shows a lot. it made me realize that
a) my marks are WAYY to important to me. i dont know HOW many people tell me this and i dont listen to them.
b) I placed school before God.
that's a bad thing. that last one there..BAD very BAD. *sigh. and i could tell. at the beginning of the year, school wasn't all that bad...i enjoyed it...got high marks...and credited them all to God..but slowly as the semester progressed..as things start to pile up...you think that maybe you can handle it yourself. oh....SOO WRONG. very very wrong. and also, after i got my marks, im dumb and i boast about them. heh. God sure taught me a lesson. not to like smite me or what not. but i mean. humility. that's it right there. no matter how good, bad, okay i do at the end of this year...humility. it all comes down to...how i reacted to all of them. it's funny when i get good marks..i say God u kno thanks for all this. then when i get bad marks...i cry.
*sigh time to go do things the RIGHT way.
balance.
God first
humility.
it sucks getting the physics test back that you thought you did well on and actually did pretty bad on. The teacher doesnt think it's bad. but you do. and on top of that, this test dropped you three percent. yes it sucks.
so i ended up getting it today after i got back to the science center and honestly when i found out it dropped me three percent. i was ready to cry. but u kno let's not cry in front of the teacher now. that's bad. i mean he knows im upset already. no need to make it worse. so on my way to my locker. i see gordon. and i showed it to him. i couldnt help it anymore. i started to cry. not like...wailing kinda cry. more like..silent tears kinda crying. and unlike everyone else, he seemed to be very understand. Gordon is always very understanding. I mean yea three percent..i kno im not allowed to complain cuz im still getting high 80s but at the same time...it's like..it's disappointing. and i just cant drop. i just..can't. and i tried to stop myself from crying..too bad the harder i tried..the more tears came out. so i said...
k agnes u gotta stop. it's not worth cryin over
then it hit me...
this crying shows a lot. it made me realize that
a) my marks are WAYY to important to me. i dont know HOW many people tell me this and i dont listen to them.
b) I placed school before God.
that's a bad thing. that last one there..BAD very BAD. *sigh. and i could tell. at the beginning of the year, school wasn't all that bad...i enjoyed it...got high marks...and credited them all to God..but slowly as the semester progressed..as things start to pile up...you think that maybe you can handle it yourself. oh....SOO WRONG. very very wrong. and also, after i got my marks, im dumb and i boast about them. heh. God sure taught me a lesson. not to like smite me or what not. but i mean. humility. that's it right there. no matter how good, bad, okay i do at the end of this year...humility. it all comes down to...how i reacted to all of them. it's funny when i get good marks..i say God u kno thanks for all this. then when i get bad marks...i cry.
*sigh time to go do things the RIGHT way.
balance.
God first
humility.
Saturday, December 02, 2006
Tuesday, November 21, 2006
chillageeee
haha k FINALLY time to tell all about my weekend.
Saturday
hehe so i spent my ACTUAL birthday doing homework. i know...im a nerd. haha don't be jealous haha and i went to bible olympics. hehe that was fun. and i got a surprise at my door =) hehe thanks
Sunday
k so this was like greatest day ever. haha umm. i was out from like....9:30-6:30. hehe exciting. went to church and Sunday school was pretty good =) haha pastor lou is oh so smart. hehe and kitty was also very smart and helpful that day =) unlike my other undecisive friends =P haha so we decided to go out for lunch to pickle barrel. =) it was yummy. i had some spanish rice thing...it was HUGE. haha it was sooo funny that day =) highlights.
that is all.
so i did my physics test today. not so bad =) haha i now have the motivation to work. i just needed a little push. a little break from it all
hehe cant wait to PA day when i can finally have a day...to watch movies. HAHA i have soo many new ones @ home =P so many cartoonsss yayyyyyy ^^ hehehe
so as for picturesss here is a preview =)
me & bellaaa
jc, issy, & i
jason, eric & i
hahahaha kissyyy
HAHA i LOVE this picture.
hahaa lookie issy and mike =P
kitty, cheryl, & i =)
he's very hungry. lol.
now he wants to eat me haha
jimmy & i
hehe k and for the rest of them...
go here: http://www.imagestation.com/6611360/3958638334
Saturday
hehe so i spent my ACTUAL birthday doing homework. i know...im a nerd. haha don't be jealous haha and i went to bible olympics. hehe that was fun. and i got a surprise at my door =) hehe thanks
Sunday
k so this was like greatest day ever. haha umm. i was out from like....9:30-6:30. hehe exciting. went to church and Sunday school was pretty good =) haha pastor lou is oh so smart. hehe and kitty was also very smart and helpful that day =) unlike my other undecisive friends =P haha so we decided to go out for lunch to pickle barrel. =) it was yummy. i had some spanish rice thing...it was HUGE. haha it was sooo funny that day =) highlights.
- darren wanting to order...breakfast =/ u're weird
- issy's goal was to scream across the other table =) hahaha k i TOTALLY failed at telling that story
- jimmy eating jam...was he really THAT hungry?
- then kenneth eating...honey? what WAS he eating?
- me getting "tipsy" over ellena's cocktail HAHA I WAS NOT TIPSY
- jason's smile
- me and issy getting soo high.
- taking pictures =) that's always fun.
that is all.
so i did my physics test today. not so bad =) haha i now have the motivation to work. i just needed a little push. a little break from it all
hehe cant wait to PA day when i can finally have a day...to watch movies. HAHA i have soo many new ones @ home =P so many cartoonsss yayyyyyy ^^ hehehe
so as for picturesss here is a preview =)
me & bellaaa
jc, issy, & i
jason, eric & i
hahahaha kissyyy
HAHA i LOVE this picture.
hahaa lookie issy and mike =P
kitty, cheryl, & i =)
he's very hungry. lol.
now he wants to eat me haha
jimmy & i
hehe k and for the rest of them...
go here: http://www.imagestation.com/6611360/3958638334
Sunday, November 19, 2006
friday night : )
Finally 17 =)
haha last night was soo joax. aww man house parties RULE. ahha so i get there and jane and dwiny are already there. dwiny was there first...AMAZING. haha and they were playing so old school old school game. SOO old school. haha but it was so funny. then we were watching i not stupid..that singapore movie : ) ehhe i love it. haha Terryy!! ahha =P when kenny's done with the second one, i want it! haha so me & jane were watching the movie and laughing. then we got too hungry to watch LOL. so we ate a little. freak by the time my mom came with food, we were too starved and ate all the other food already. haha so we weren't as hungry. haha but yesterday was TOTAL joax. watching friends during dinner. haha and being entertained by nat's hamster. hehe i love it =) soo cute. i love bebe.
i had a good time talking to bev last night :) see hun u said we never talk haha we ended up talking last night :) hehe it felt nice. haha everyone is yelling downstairs and we're upstairs in nat's room all dark and talking. : ) ahha then dwiny comes in. HAHA and bev goes to the bathroom and doesnt close the door LMAO. AHHA edwin's like..I CAN SEE YOU IN THE MIRROR! haha joax joax. then haha edwin tells us bout hte time where he was singing jenny from the block LMAO! hahahaha edwin singing jenny from the block HAHAHAHA aww man. soo joax. then we went downstairs and i played a little piano...played ddr AHHA so joax when gordon and calvin plays. AHHA calvin like..rolls up his pants and gordon dances in a circle HAHAH he SPINS. LMAO soo joax. aww man. and camy is so light that the mat doesnt detect her HAHA or so tuntun said. when we were taking group pictures hahaha so joax. haha omgsh alton sat on my face! FREAK haha eh was going to punch nat jeh i think and he jus slides down and sat on my face. im like..OMGSH ALTON'S BUTT IS IN MY FACE! haha eww so grossssssss a moment i will DEFINATELY NOT forget (sadly)
haha we had cake : ) hehe it was sooo yummyyy THANK YOU GORDON :) hehe then after, we went to go lie in nat's room, typical tradition. haha the let's all go sleep on the floor, bed, and chairs of nat jeh's room AHHA and count the stars on her ceiling. ahha and gordon took the pillow away from me : ( poooo. ahha and me & jane were laughing @ EVERYTHING. haha and i got money for my goat :) hehe thanks guysss :) and ppl started leaving. haha ohh and can't forget about the joax conversation with me, jane, gordon, calvin & monique about SJM people. AHHAAA aww man. good times.
THANK YOU
thanks trisia, bev, jason, dickson, dwin, camy, alton, kenny, calvin, jon ng, carole, davis, monique, gordon for comingg :) hehe
thanks to my daughter for her awesome note haha
thanks everyone for the money : )
thanks jc for first one to call me @ 12am haha
thanks carole for calling me SECOND :P haha at 12:01am
thanks mel : ) haha first txt! at 12
thanks freddy for the ecard
thanks jc for ur presents :) hehe love them
thanks to my bestest girls : ) hehe u guys made last night AMAZING
thanks everyone :) lots more to go. haha
pictures coming soon :)
post about today later.
haha last night was soo joax. aww man house parties RULE. ahha so i get there and jane and dwiny are already there. dwiny was there first...AMAZING. haha and they were playing so old school old school game. SOO old school. haha but it was so funny. then we were watching i not stupid..that singapore movie : ) ehhe i love it. haha Terryy!! ahha =P when kenny's done with the second one, i want it! haha so me & jane were watching the movie and laughing. then we got too hungry to watch LOL. so we ate a little. freak by the time my mom came with food, we were too starved and ate all the other food already. haha so we weren't as hungry. haha but yesterday was TOTAL joax. watching friends during dinner. haha and being entertained by nat's hamster. hehe i love it =) soo cute. i love bebe.
i had a good time talking to bev last night :) see hun u said we never talk haha we ended up talking last night :) hehe it felt nice. haha everyone is yelling downstairs and we're upstairs in nat's room all dark and talking. : ) ahha then dwiny comes in. HAHA and bev goes to the bathroom and doesnt close the door LMAO. AHHA edwin's like..I CAN SEE YOU IN THE MIRROR! haha joax joax. then haha edwin tells us bout hte time where he was singing jenny from the block LMAO! hahahaha edwin singing jenny from the block HAHAHAHA aww man. soo joax. then we went downstairs and i played a little piano...played ddr AHHA so joax when gordon and calvin plays. AHHA calvin like..rolls up his pants and gordon dances in a circle HAHAH he SPINS. LMAO soo joax. aww man. and camy is so light that the mat doesnt detect her HAHA or so tuntun said. when we were taking group pictures hahaha so joax. haha omgsh alton sat on my face! FREAK haha eh was going to punch nat jeh i think and he jus slides down and sat on my face. im like..OMGSH ALTON'S BUTT IS IN MY FACE! haha eww so grossssssss a moment i will DEFINATELY NOT forget (sadly)
haha we had cake : ) hehe it was sooo yummyyy THANK YOU GORDON :) hehe then after, we went to go lie in nat's room, typical tradition. haha the let's all go sleep on the floor, bed, and chairs of nat jeh's room AHHA and count the stars on her ceiling. ahha and gordon took the pillow away from me : ( poooo. ahha and me & jane were laughing @ EVERYTHING. haha and i got money for my goat :) hehe thanks guysss :) and ppl started leaving. haha ohh and can't forget about the joax conversation with me, jane, gordon, calvin & monique about SJM people. AHHAAA aww man. good times.
THANK YOU
thanks trisia, bev, jason, dickson, dwin, camy, alton, kenny, calvin, jon ng, carole, davis, monique, gordon for comingg :) hehe
thanks to my daughter for her awesome note haha
thanks everyone for the money : )
thanks jc for first one to call me @ 12am haha
thanks carole for calling me SECOND :P haha at 12:01am
thanks mel : ) haha first txt! at 12
thanks freddy for the ecard
thanks jc for ur presents :) hehe love them
thanks to my bestest girls : ) hehe u guys made last night AMAZING
thanks everyone :) lots more to go. haha
pictures coming soon :)
post about today later.
Saturday, November 18, 2006
Sunday, November 12, 2006
im glad we're cool again :)
hehe im so excited for next weekend!
and i bought presents for other people today...well this whole weekend..and i actually found stuff! in like..two hours. pretty good man. haha i felt very proud of myself. :) productive shopping.
hehe and im finally pmsing :P AHAHA so im not randomly angry anymore! :)
k im a little weird. back to biology!
hehe im so excited for next weekend!
and i bought presents for other people today...well this whole weekend..and i actually found stuff! in like..two hours. pretty good man. haha i felt very proud of myself. :) productive shopping.
hehe and im finally pmsing :P AHAHA so im not randomly angry anymore! :)
k im a little weird. back to biology!
Monday, November 06, 2006
so i decided...
this year for my birthday...i want to buy a goat for those families on the other side of the world : )
i was talking to my parents about poverty during dinner today and i honestly almost cried.
so time to do something about it!
so i found the chinese version of the world vision christmas catalogue and asked my mom if we could buy a cow. Then she was like...see this is why you shouldn't have bought your ipod. i was like..that's true...then my dad was like..why don't you get your friends to buy a cow as a present for your birthday?
so i said...YEA!
so no more wanting stuff for myself.
time go give give give.
time to buy some people a goat.
hehe excited.
this year for my birthday...i want to buy a goat for those families on the other side of the world : )
i was talking to my parents about poverty during dinner today and i honestly almost cried.
so time to do something about it!
so i found the chinese version of the world vision christmas catalogue and asked my mom if we could buy a cow. Then she was like...see this is why you shouldn't have bought your ipod. i was like..that's true...then my dad was like..why don't you get your friends to buy a cow as a present for your birthday?
so i said...YEA!
so no more wanting stuff for myself.
time go give give give.
time to buy some people a goat.
hehe excited.
Sunday, November 05, 2006
wow...
This weekend had a lot of hitting going on. Lots of yelling from God. not like..angry yelling. more like.."wake up" yelling.
So Friday was Missions Night and God really really spoke to me. What Pastor Lou said that night I will never forget. When talking about missions, he said
The question is not whether or not you're ready. I'm sure all missionaries weren't ready. The question is ARE YOU WILLING? If you are willing, God will automatically be ready and He will make you ready.
that night was kind of like...a nudge at the heart. Throughout this week, this question echoes in my head. are you willing?
so i stand....emptyhanded...filled with fear...but more filled with love and faith...and say.
Here I am Lord.
Use me.
I never really truly understood God's love until today. I mean...I guess I'll never fully understand why He would die for someone like me but I got a totally different meaning out of it today at Sunday school.
"This is love: not that we loved God, but that He loved us and sent His Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins." - 1 John 4:10
I learned today that we are incapable of loving God. It's called total depravity. Love is when we have nothing to offer God and YET he still loves us. We are incapable because we are useless to God. kinda hit me like a ton of bricks.
God who is SO BIG loves us, even though He doesn't get anything out of it.
That is love. It REALLY doesn't get better than this.
So Friday was Missions Night and God really really spoke to me. What Pastor Lou said that night I will never forget. When talking about missions, he said
The question is not whether or not you're ready. I'm sure all missionaries weren't ready. The question is ARE YOU WILLING? If you are willing, God will automatically be ready and He will make you ready.
that night was kind of like...a nudge at the heart. Throughout this week, this question echoes in my head. are you willing?
so i stand....emptyhanded...filled with fear...but more filled with love and faith...and say.
Here I am Lord.
Use me.
I never really truly understood God's love until today. I mean...I guess I'll never fully understand why He would die for someone like me but I got a totally different meaning out of it today at Sunday school.
"This is love: not that we loved God, but that He loved us and sent His Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins." - 1 John 4:10
I learned today that we are incapable of loving God. It's called total depravity. Love is when we have nothing to offer God and YET he still loves us. We are incapable because we are useless to God. kinda hit me like a ton of bricks.
God who is SO BIG loves us, even though He doesn't get anything out of it.
That is love. It REALLY doesn't get better than this.
Saturday, October 28, 2006
yesterday was the greatest day : ) hehe
so im eating dinner...and melody decides to call me and ask what i'm doing...and i had to go to dinner..so i couldn't talk to her..like...15minutes later...she calls again...and she says
m: "look outside your door!!"
a: "omgsh are you here?!?!?"
m: "no i'm in waterloo -_-"
a: shuddup!
so i open the door and there's mel. omgshh haha such a surprise. but i did have a bit of suspicion. lolz. :P and then we called andy & darren and tricked them and they thot i was in loo :) hehe it was fun. haha and mel i'll buy u a cookie this week...not homemade..but i'll get you one :) hehe it's awesome seeing u. stupid girl not being able to come back for my bday :(
then we went to tiff's house to cook haha and my group is so cool : ) haha silas can't wash his fryer properly...haha and it was very old hahaa but it was so cool! i've never seen the whole fry-ingness happen before :) it was exciting. haha and then i touched timbit's lion >< by accident. lol. then...we made fish and chips and i took pictures : ) and then rachel stabbed a lemon.hehe and our whole fellowship was cheering her on. haha good times last night : ) i <3 my cell group.
then we went out to bbt after fellowship. It was me, silas, chung, tiff, betty, freddy, porshia, kitty, ivan, and donna. haha omgsh so joax that my face hrurt so much in the end and i was so exhausted and i almost lost my voice. ahha the bbt was really good too :) hehe feddy's treat. :P haha so joax. :P stories from scott missions hahaha too many good times tiff : ) haha i dont even remember what we talked about last night =/ haha something about metrosexual hahaha and something about...ms.J or something hahaha i dont even remember..but i was just too funny haha i <3 you guys. went home @ 12. omgsh ahha never went home @ 12 before :P hahaha darren, jason, sharon, david & jon look! haha a record :P
so yesterday i was bored before fellowship and made this:
hehe :)
so im eating dinner...and melody decides to call me and ask what i'm doing...and i had to go to dinner..so i couldn't talk to her..like...15minutes later...she calls again...and she says
m: "look outside your door!!"
a: "omgsh are you here?!?!?"
m: "no i'm in waterloo -_-"
a: shuddup!
so i open the door and there's mel. omgshh haha such a surprise. but i did have a bit of suspicion. lolz. :P and then we called andy & darren and tricked them and they thot i was in loo :) hehe it was fun. haha and mel i'll buy u a cookie this week...not homemade..but i'll get you one :) hehe it's awesome seeing u. stupid girl not being able to come back for my bday :(
then we went to tiff's house to cook haha and my group is so cool : ) haha silas can't wash his fryer properly...haha and it was very old hahaa but it was so cool! i've never seen the whole fry-ingness happen before :) it was exciting. haha and then i touched timbit's lion >< by accident. lol. then...we made fish and chips and i took pictures : ) and then rachel stabbed a lemon.hehe and our whole fellowship was cheering her on. haha good times last night : ) i <3 my cell group.
then we went out to bbt after fellowship. It was me, silas, chung, tiff, betty, freddy, porshia, kitty, ivan, and donna. haha omgsh so joax that my face hrurt so much in the end and i was so exhausted and i almost lost my voice. ahha the bbt was really good too :) hehe feddy's treat. :P haha so joax. :P stories from scott missions hahaha too many good times tiff : ) haha i dont even remember what we talked about last night =/ haha something about metrosexual hahaha and something about...ms.J or something hahaha i dont even remember..but i was just too funny haha i <3 you guys. went home @ 12. omgsh ahha never went home @ 12 before :P hahaha darren, jason, sharon, david & jon look! haha a record :P
so yesterday i was bored before fellowship and made this:
hehe :)
Friday, October 27, 2006
Uncertainty.
I've realized recently that I freak myself out a lot by exaggerating everything a heck lot more...to only myself. It's kind of scary...I'm in my last year of highschool...I'm applying for universities and scholarships...I'm learning to be indepedent. And yet throughout it all, starting from the beginning...it's been rare since i asked...what's God going to do. And not just in fellowship and church but in my LIFE. What does HE want for me? What's He doing THROUGH me?
Even as I am currently writing the last essay for the Canadian Mert award, there's this sense of uncertainty, this sense of fear that things won't go exactly the way they are in my head. It's still very surreal to me that I'm in grade 12...i mean I don't feel any different...sure we feel older and we know everybody in the school...but what about my future? it scares me that it seems so close. I mean I have to apply for universities and what not. and as I'm rushing and planning my future, I hear this little voice. "What if things don't work out this way?" What if I don't get into the university i want to get into? (Queens) and What if I don't get any scholarships and don't have a 90 average and cant get into my program? Then what?
then i hear this other little voice (i'm not psychotic) and it says.."Why are you worrying so much? Whatever happen to giving it up to God this year and letting Him lead you where He wants you to go. Until last year, I never really understood how you can glorify God's kingdom by going to school. I mean...why don't we all just go out and do missions or something and not go to school? But as I study biology and physics and chemistry and all those fun other subjects, i begin to realize and see God in everything. Every little thing i learn in biology amazes me because I realized...God created it all...I mean EVERY little intricate thing. amazing. it's breathtaking.
and in my head i have this little plan that I'm going to serve God by being a (insert occupation) in the future and going to ( insert university) and all that jazz. but at the same time God is saying.."What if i don't want you there?"
I have this amazing fear that i wont get into Queens...because then I wouldn't know what to do. I scared that maybe God doesn't want me there. But then I remembered this:
For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. - Jeremiah 29:11
and there's reassurance. So even though I'm sinking into a whole sea of uncertainty, it's like there's this little bubble around me that I cant see, helping me understand that everything is going to be alright.
Even as I am currently writing the last essay for the Canadian Mert award, there's this sense of uncertainty, this sense of fear that things won't go exactly the way they are in my head. It's still very surreal to me that I'm in grade 12...i mean I don't feel any different...sure we feel older and we know everybody in the school...but what about my future? it scares me that it seems so close. I mean I have to apply for universities and what not. and as I'm rushing and planning my future, I hear this little voice. "What if things don't work out this way?" What if I don't get into the university i want to get into? (Queens) and What if I don't get any scholarships and don't have a 90 average and cant get into my program? Then what?
then i hear this other little voice (i'm not psychotic) and it says.."Why are you worrying so much? Whatever happen to giving it up to God this year and letting Him lead you where He wants you to go. Until last year, I never really understood how you can glorify God's kingdom by going to school. I mean...why don't we all just go out and do missions or something and not go to school? But as I study biology and physics and chemistry and all those fun other subjects, i begin to realize and see God in everything. Every little thing i learn in biology amazes me because I realized...God created it all...I mean EVERY little intricate thing. amazing. it's breathtaking.
and in my head i have this little plan that I'm going to serve God by being a (insert occupation) in the future and going to ( insert university) and all that jazz. but at the same time God is saying.."What if i don't want you there?"
I have this amazing fear that i wont get into Queens...because then I wouldn't know what to do. I scared that maybe God doesn't want me there. But then I remembered this:
For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. - Jeremiah 29:11
and there's reassurance. So even though I'm sinking into a whole sea of uncertainty, it's like there's this little bubble around me that I cant see, helping me understand that everything is going to be alright.
Sunday, October 22, 2006
today was cool : ) cept i failed this morning
i didn't turn on my phone...so darren shows up to my door early haha and not bearing a sausage mcmuffin. darn ahha if only i turned on my cell fone. haha oh well. so we went to worship practice : ) hha i tried carrying the congas...to heavy and so i carried the drummer stool instead : ) hahahahahha HUGE difference there. haha then darren made fun of me for the noises i made when i was carrying the electric because it was HEAVY! haha i thought it was. then jw started taunting me tooooo. i was like..are you guys going to taunt me for the rest of my life? they're like..are you going to be like this for the rest of your life? uh oh. ahha then darren walked into the mic stand : ) it was funny. it was like my time to laugh at HIM. i felt accomplished
worship practice was awesome : ) actual worship was even better! haha. i was so filled : ) the whole place was so filled. it's like..you can feel it when people are genuine in their worship. it was exactly what JW said worship should be:
Well chosen
well understood
well played
then i did children's worship ....wow they actually sang today. pretty impressive i must say. haha went back downstairs...and eric stole my jacket, stretched it by wearing it, then tim started taking off my fur. XP i dont like u guys. sunday school is awesome too! : ) talking about leadership : )
then i went shopping!!!!! got a sweater and two scarf belts :) hehe happy :) then i finished bio, which i actually didn't mind doing...i like genetics :) and now im sitting here doing algeo and talking to people : )
thanks mel n dt for trying to reassure me that my 90 really isn't sucha big deal. <3>
i didn't turn on my phone...so darren shows up to my door early haha and not bearing a sausage mcmuffin. darn ahha if only i turned on my cell fone. haha oh well. so we went to worship practice : ) hha i tried carrying the congas...to heavy and so i carried the drummer stool instead : ) hahahahahha HUGE difference there. haha then darren made fun of me for the noises i made when i was carrying the electric because it was HEAVY! haha i thought it was. then jw started taunting me tooooo. i was like..are you guys going to taunt me for the rest of my life? they're like..are you going to be like this for the rest of your life? uh oh. ahha then darren walked into the mic stand : ) it was funny. it was like my time to laugh at HIM. i felt accomplished
worship practice was awesome : ) actual worship was even better! haha. i was so filled : ) the whole place was so filled. it's like..you can feel it when people are genuine in their worship. it was exactly what JW said worship should be:
Well chosen
well understood
well played
then i did children's worship ....wow they actually sang today. pretty impressive i must say. haha went back downstairs...and eric stole my jacket, stretched it by wearing it, then tim started taking off my fur. XP i dont like u guys. sunday school is awesome too! : ) talking about leadership : )
then i went shopping!!!!! got a sweater and two scarf belts :) hehe happy :) then i finished bio, which i actually didn't mind doing...i like genetics :) and now im sitting here doing algeo and talking to people : )
thanks mel n dt for trying to reassure me that my 90 really isn't sucha big deal. <3>
saturdayness
k so i went to the open house for UTSC yesterday...i don't really want to go there. haha so 3rd choice. yes. haha the place is very crowded. I don't know...i'm excited for queens in two weeks though! haha
went to worship practice after and talked to darren a little. He was trying to tell me that 90s aren't a big deal. haha as usual, i don't listen haha *sigh i gotta start learning to have less expectations. As much as i want 90s, it's disappointing to know that I might not get them this year. It's even more fustrating knowing that no matter how much i study from the textbook, my teachers are psychotic and think NOTHING like the textbook. *sigh. needa get through this sem, then i'll be fine. forget physics...i'm going to try my best and if i get 80, then 80 it is. haha darren would be happy with an 80 haha : P
so yes. worship practice was AH-MAZING :) haha so fun and loud aha i like it loud now haah i think 4 weeks of loud music got me used to it :P haha no need for earplugs for meeee haha so i'm starting two songs....im scared when i start songs haha i realize my confidence really aint so high...like i don't mind doing stupid things but when people tell me im good at _________, i don't believe them. haha so yes. i'm scared for tomorrow because i'm leading TWO SONGS. ho gang ahhhh haha and totally loving hsieh's christina aguilera style. ahha even though it messes me up :P haha i'll live. haha and darren's awesome electric-ing skills aha omgsh the boy can play everything =/ pronessss haha and when sam says that he'll try...it means he's going to pro it on his first try HAHA :P really really cool : ) the song set is..well picked, well understood, well played. i think that was it :) haha then on the car ride home me and darren made up a new word haha i'm a FREAK with a PH and a C so it's PHREAC HAHA omgsh we have issues. =/
k back to biology in hopes to pass my genetics unit
imu
went to worship practice after and talked to darren a little. He was trying to tell me that 90s aren't a big deal. haha as usual, i don't listen haha *sigh i gotta start learning to have less expectations. As much as i want 90s, it's disappointing to know that I might not get them this year. It's even more fustrating knowing that no matter how much i study from the textbook, my teachers are psychotic and think NOTHING like the textbook. *sigh. needa get through this sem, then i'll be fine. forget physics...i'm going to try my best and if i get 80, then 80 it is. haha darren would be happy with an 80 haha : P
so yes. worship practice was AH-MAZING :) haha so fun and loud aha i like it loud now haah i think 4 weeks of loud music got me used to it :P haha no need for earplugs for meeee haha so i'm starting two songs....im scared when i start songs haha i realize my confidence really aint so high...like i don't mind doing stupid things but when people tell me im good at _________, i don't believe them. haha so yes. i'm scared for tomorrow because i'm leading TWO SONGS. ho gang ahhhh haha and totally loving hsieh's christina aguilera style. ahha even though it messes me up :P haha i'll live. haha and darren's awesome electric-ing skills aha omgsh the boy can play everything =/ pronessss haha and when sam says that he'll try...it means he's going to pro it on his first try HAHA :P really really cool : ) the song set is..well picked, well understood, well played. i think that was it :) haha then on the car ride home me and darren made up a new word haha i'm a FREAK with a PH and a C so it's PHREAC HAHA omgsh we have issues. =/
k back to biology in hopes to pass my genetics unit
imu
Monday, October 16, 2006
Christ's Entrusted Servant
k so i think i've prolonged the whole "let's blog about my weekend" long enough. so let's recap about my amazinggg weekenddd
Friday
so fellowship and i drove :) haha got there a little early and helped set up chairs :) it's been a while since i did something so small and felt so good. haha then talked to silas and then i shared before worship started. Wow it was awesome and weird...sitting on the other side. haha but it was just so much more amazing. haha it feels SO good to take a break : P haha sorry rach looks like you'll be taking over for a while :P haha but u're SO good! honestly! haha and jackie is learning how to use the shaker haha. and silas' gtaring always makes me smile haha so pro man. Skit night was mad fun too! : ) i was in a group with daniel, collin, rach, and byron. haha it was so joax, me being stupid and ditzy haha and all the other groups skits were good too! it was AWESOME. haha so joax. i have them all on video :P u want, come talk to me. And the counsellor skit was wicked man. haha tiff was all gangsta and tim was being all nuts haha aww man it was good :) Then after fellowship, i got the phantom of the opera piano book (YES! now i can play) and a cup that TOTALLY describes me haha. thanks.
Saturday
omgsh greatest day EVER. So i woke up at like....7:45...early i know...and got ready for scott missions. I was so excited! i was like excited about it all week! i mean it was so different...never done it before :) ahha so Barry drove me and nat and tommy & joanna down to scott missions and when we got there, we took out all the clothing and what not to bring inside. Then this other couple comes up and wants to deliver some clothes too and since we were already in a line, we offered to bring them in for them. and they were so grateful. They were like...oh wow thank you and they were all smiling and what not : ) it made me so happy. So then we went in and i went downstairs to pack and store and bag food. I must admit, at first i was like...aww i wanted to cook. But when i went down there, i was like..WOW so much food! there was like..an IMMENSE amount of food. and i felt this little tug from God and He said, "I want you to be down here. I have great plans for you." And i smiled because i knew that God never EVER breaks His promises. So first i was bagging rice with tiff and natalie and it was so cool : ) haha it was so much fun just talking to them and getting to know them more and serving with them. It's so different when you're doing something so small with people and you can fellowship so easily. And it was also awesome serving with nat, totally diff serving with someone from school. We were very productive : ) haha and the gloves were mighty tight :P haha and i have sweating problems. hahaha tiff & nat would know : ( Then we bagged granola bars and barry came to join us and help us : ) it was just so cool fellowshiping with them and serving with them.
The whole feeling of humility came upon me, knowing that I'm only doing something so small, yet God can do great things with it. As I bag those granola bars and the powder milk and the rice, I wonder who's going to get these and how big of an impact it would make on these people. I remember one thing that nat said that day that I honestly wouldn't forget. After seeing that people come in here to eat and to find a place where they can just come in for a meal she said, "I feel so happy for them, that they get a place like this to eat" It may not seem much, but at that point, i knew God was using us in His big awesome plan. Isn't that amazing? God, who is so BIG and so AMAZING decides to use US in his plan. Totally blown away man.
Scott missions totally made my week : ) watching so many people do such little things so willingly is amazing and very humbling (is that a word?) And fellowshiping is even better haha so many good times : )
the rest of the day ended well with worship practice and my first time playing piano for sunday service and then my second uncle's wedding reception. ahha totally hype and fun haha dancing was awesome. haha and the DJ rocked. even my PARENTS were dancing. haha that says something. hahahahaha and dessert was AMAZING. i'm a big fan of dessert. haha yummy
Sunday
SO played piano for worship haha i think i should stick to singing and give sam back the piano haha. Dr. Dennis spoke and his message was so inspiring. To bless or to curse. To have a balance of everything. To be a CES (Christ Entrusted Servant) and not a CEO (I don't know what this stands for : P) and then jw sunday school : ) I love JW teaching sunday school haha it's so cool. we took a spiritual gifts test and my top two are music and prayer. and my lowest was leadership..hmm is God trying to tell me something here? But one thing that STRUCK me was the question:
Did God entrust me with this responsibility?
one of my biggest fear is serving in a specific area because I want to, not because God wants me to. Perhaps God has called others to serve, to do a better job.
so yes tonz of lessons this week :) God's taught me
that the little things matter as much as the big things,
that He has called all of us to do something different
that He chose to put us into His plan (wow)
Friday
so fellowship and i drove :) haha got there a little early and helped set up chairs :) it's been a while since i did something so small and felt so good. haha then talked to silas and then i shared before worship started. Wow it was awesome and weird...sitting on the other side. haha but it was just so much more amazing. haha it feels SO good to take a break : P haha sorry rach looks like you'll be taking over for a while :P haha but u're SO good! honestly! haha and jackie is learning how to use the shaker haha. and silas' gtaring always makes me smile haha so pro man. Skit night was mad fun too! : ) i was in a group with daniel, collin, rach, and byron. haha it was so joax, me being stupid and ditzy haha and all the other groups skits were good too! it was AWESOME. haha so joax. i have them all on video :P u want, come talk to me. And the counsellor skit was wicked man. haha tiff was all gangsta and tim was being all nuts haha aww man it was good :) Then after fellowship, i got the phantom of the opera piano book (YES! now i can play) and a cup that TOTALLY describes me haha. thanks.
Saturday
omgsh greatest day EVER. So i woke up at like....7:45...early i know...and got ready for scott missions. I was so excited! i was like excited about it all week! i mean it was so different...never done it before :) ahha so Barry drove me and nat and tommy & joanna down to scott missions and when we got there, we took out all the clothing and what not to bring inside. Then this other couple comes up and wants to deliver some clothes too and since we were already in a line, we offered to bring them in for them. and they were so grateful. They were like...oh wow thank you and they were all smiling and what not : ) it made me so happy. So then we went in and i went downstairs to pack and store and bag food. I must admit, at first i was like...aww i wanted to cook. But when i went down there, i was like..WOW so much food! there was like..an IMMENSE amount of food. and i felt this little tug from God and He said, "I want you to be down here. I have great plans for you." And i smiled because i knew that God never EVER breaks His promises. So first i was bagging rice with tiff and natalie and it was so cool : ) haha it was so much fun just talking to them and getting to know them more and serving with them. It's so different when you're doing something so small with people and you can fellowship so easily. And it was also awesome serving with nat, totally diff serving with someone from school. We were very productive : ) haha and the gloves were mighty tight :P haha and i have sweating problems. hahaha tiff & nat would know : ( Then we bagged granola bars and barry came to join us and help us : ) it was just so cool fellowshiping with them and serving with them.
The whole feeling of humility came upon me, knowing that I'm only doing something so small, yet God can do great things with it. As I bag those granola bars and the powder milk and the rice, I wonder who's going to get these and how big of an impact it would make on these people. I remember one thing that nat said that day that I honestly wouldn't forget. After seeing that people come in here to eat and to find a place where they can just come in for a meal she said, "I feel so happy for them, that they get a place like this to eat" It may not seem much, but at that point, i knew God was using us in His big awesome plan. Isn't that amazing? God, who is so BIG and so AMAZING decides to use US in his plan. Totally blown away man.
Scott missions totally made my week : ) watching so many people do such little things so willingly is amazing and very humbling (is that a word?) And fellowshiping is even better haha so many good times : )
the rest of the day ended well with worship practice and my first time playing piano for sunday service and then my second uncle's wedding reception. ahha totally hype and fun haha dancing was awesome. haha and the DJ rocked. even my PARENTS were dancing. haha that says something. hahahahaha and dessert was AMAZING. i'm a big fan of dessert. haha yummy
Sunday
SO played piano for worship haha i think i should stick to singing and give sam back the piano haha. Dr. Dennis spoke and his message was so inspiring. To bless or to curse. To have a balance of everything. To be a CES (Christ Entrusted Servant) and not a CEO (I don't know what this stands for : P) and then jw sunday school : ) I love JW teaching sunday school haha it's so cool. we took a spiritual gifts test and my top two are music and prayer. and my lowest was leadership..hmm is God trying to tell me something here? But one thing that STRUCK me was the question:
Did God entrust me with this responsibility?
one of my biggest fear is serving in a specific area because I want to, not because God wants me to. Perhaps God has called others to serve, to do a better job.
so yes tonz of lessons this week :) God's taught me
that the little things matter as much as the big things,
that He has called all of us to do something different
that He chose to put us into His plan (wow)
Thursday, October 12, 2006
God's taught me a LOT just the past two days.
He gives and takes away.
so two days ago...had the greatest day cuz
a) i was getting a 93 in chem
b) i was getting 95 in algeo
c) i prayed during a test and got soo much better than i expected. TOTALLY His doing
then today:
a) i'm getting 87 in chem
b) i messed up on my algeo test.
i can say im was okay about it...but it was upsetting i guess..it's hard...when u have such high marks..one mistake and they can go down so much. *ugh fustrating. i needa 90 average on that midterm man. But we'll see where God takes me
yea that sums it up.
but im thankful because
- He taught me to not be boastful & prideful
- He gave me AWESOME friends
- He gave me amazing teachers who care so much about me
- He gave me somebody who cares so much about me
- He gave me family that knows that i might fail sometimes and it's okay
so yes : ) k now i needa work. *hai bio quiz tomorrow and i can't bomb that either.
He gives and takes away.
so two days ago...had the greatest day cuz
a) i was getting a 93 in chem
b) i was getting 95 in algeo
c) i prayed during a test and got soo much better than i expected. TOTALLY His doing
then today:
a) i'm getting 87 in chem
b) i messed up on my algeo test.
i can say im was okay about it...but it was upsetting i guess..it's hard...when u have such high marks..one mistake and they can go down so much. *ugh fustrating. i needa 90 average on that midterm man. But we'll see where God takes me
yea that sums it up.
but im thankful because
- He taught me to not be boastful & prideful
- He gave me AWESOME friends
- He gave me amazing teachers who care so much about me
- He gave me somebody who cares so much about me
- He gave me family that knows that i might fail sometimes and it's okay
so yes : ) k now i needa work. *hai bio quiz tomorrow and i can't bomb that either.
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