call to action.

okay so today was a pretty good day

church and painting and nat's house and dinner with my grandparents


I'm slowly beginning to see that people matter a lot to me. I mean yea I knew that before...but it hits you when you realize...some things. So my grandparents came back to Canada, after being gone for like..two years. and I haven't seen them for a really long time. And you know...as people get old, they get sicker and stuff, and i've been worried and stuff but i was really excited to see them. My grandma looked the same and everything...and what hit me was my grandpa. He came in...on a wheelchair, which i knew he would, but i guess it never really hit me. He was so much skinnier, he looked so small. Two years ago, he was walking with a walking stick and it was okay. I mean he still got spunk. But when i saw him today...he looked so sad, so hopeless, so lifeless...so weak. And it made me want to cry. And even when i saw him smile a little bit, just to see his daughters, his grandchildren, it made him look so frail...so fragile. And i guess im still wanting to cry as i type this....I mean i guess i never really knew my grandparents mattered that much to me until now. And for the entire dinner...i felt so...i don't know...sad. Age is getting to him, and im slowly realizing that moments need to be treasured. I'm slowly realizing that it all matters to him, that everyday matters.

And a thought that even made me sadder was that...while so sick, so incapable of doing so many things, He doesn't know God. It kills to think that he's going by everyday, not knowing that something better might be in store for him, not knowing that there's someone who loves Him so much and is going to make everything okay. Totally strike me how important sharing God's word is. So ...action time.

neverending prayer and action.

summer here i come

Yes yes yes!

I am officially

DONE

hehe yayyy summer here i come! haha

that means i can...

-visit kitty and darren sometime @ waterloo
-play softball
-go to wonderland
-bbqsss : )
-go out after fellowship
-go SHOPPING
-eat and ddr and slack off at home

: ) oh what a wonderful time hahaha : P

P.S. Kitty, don't worry! I'll come...but i have to wait till everybody else finishes...so that university children can drive me : P

almost done almost done! : )

yayyy i survived..last week...

im surviving this week : )

it's almost coming to an end...one more days. and then i'll be DONE

religion exam yesterday was SOO easy :) I felt so happy afterwards haha
but math..*sigh we'll see it was okay la~ i don't like exams that were okay la~

then i can paint after exams!:) i have to paint tiles for teachers that are leaving...im excited...haven't painted for a while..like ACTUALLY paint. haha nice to get my creativity flowing again.

Praise the Lord from bringing me through this week and even giving me time to do devos : ) oh He is so cool : )

Things to look forward to:
-softball (finally : P)
-worship night thingy : )
- grandparents coming
- painting
- wonderland w/ my girlprends :)
- graduation (singing) haha the deserts :P

: ) : ) yayyyy mad fun totally excited

exams on wed, thurs, fri.

comm tech cpt due tuesday...not done

which means didnt start studying

oh so screwed

but i'm not gonna go and totally rely on myself anymore. Done that for the past like..month and it SUCKS. Giving it all up to Him. my worries, my stress, my joys, my confusion, my accomplishments...are all His.

thanks guys for helping me through : ) and just checking up on me. you know who you are <3

one more week...then it's OVER :D

*sigh im like slowly disintergrating...

not like..burning or anything

just tired..exhausted..fed up..drained

and i'm so far from God...it's so hard these days for me to figure out the right thing to do...the thing God wants me to do.

It's so hard to keep devos consistant and have my heart at it when i do it

it's so hard to pray sincerely without having other things on my mind or without being too tired

*sigh nobody said it was going to be easy

but i jus wish i wasnt so weak

untitled.

so i dragonboated today. haha wow we did so bad. but w/e our first year. haha fun times with my team china : P haha go boys and the catwalk and that awesome game of pig :P haha good stuff. so today was alright..but inside....it feel...incredibly sad..iuno why. it's weird. yea i mean today was good..laughs and what not...but i feel...ridiculously empty. *sigh God what's wrong with me.

And iuno bible study on Friday....*haii iuno. it felt so weird...and i was so tired. sorry ivan.


ughhh soo dun wanna work

sooo tired

*sigh...imma pull through..it's almost over

getting back up on my feet

so the hecticness is FINALLY over (for now) I went through this week..and yes staying till like 2:30 doing an essay is DEFINATELY not fun. okay now...time to get back on track with God. As much as school is important, i gotta keep my eyes fix on God. Easier said than done.

"Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us." - Romans 5:3-5

I'm currently loving this verse. I don't know...I guess mainly because, as hard as it is to do, to rejoice in our sufferings, i want to learn how to. and as i do that...the end result is so promising. hope that does not disappoint. the only thing that is unchanging. His love.

So yesterday, it was St. Augustine's feast day (not birthday, my bad) and so we had mass. For those of you who don't know, I go to a catholic school. And the priest was teaching about that passage where Jesus asked Peter three times if he loved Him. And the priest asked us this, "If Jesus was to ask you right now...what would your response be?"
As ashamed I feel saying this, I've lost track as to where i am with God. I feel like...I haven't really gone anywhere, nor have I tried to. The priest also mentioned that love is a word that means nothing until action is taken. If I haven't taken action lately, could I really say that I love God? So my goal from now on, put my love in action. it hurts to know that i haven't done that. But it takes so much more than just feeling ashamed, it takes change.

last night fellowship was really good, i liked it a lot. Just time to pray, to reflect. i especially liked the last part. that was so cool. : ) thanks candee, anita, & donna for planning it. you guys did an awesome job.